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Joke of the Day

"My dad told me they once had to cancel a football season because John Madden ate all of the footballs."

"How can a room full of couples be empty? There isn't a single person left! Bwahahahahaha"

"Cop- Do you have any drugs in the vehicle? -No, go fish."

"What happened to the boy who ran into a window He was in serious PANE"

"I do NOT trust my bowels... I just think they're full of shit _"

"What dose a device that makes electricity and a person who likes a comment on caitlyn's face book page have in common? They are both generators (jenner-rater)"

"I like my coffee like Thomas Jefferson likes his women Hand picked from a field."

"Why do old men need a Viagra and a Doans before sex? The Doans is so their back don't peter out, and the Viagra is so their peter don't back out!"

"Ate way too much..I'm gonna go to Africa and throw up everything I just ate for all the starving children..yes I do have a generous side."

"The girls who don't get a rose on The Bachelor should automatically get a cat."