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Joke of the Day

"Why did NASA hire a proctologist? To help plan the trip to Uranus."

"I had anal sex and my sperm were so confused They tried to fertilize a piece of corn."

"*cleans house while wife's out* W: *walks in* wow babe, thanks so- M: APRIL FOOL'S *runs around making huge mess til it's worse than before*"

"How does a jew make coffee? Hebrews it.."

"DATING TIP: Girls love sensitive guys. Loudly wince when she touches you. Re-apply sunblock 38 times. Bring up how often your gums bleed."

"What do you call a Polish fisherman? A fishing pole."

"If olive oil comes from olives where does baby oil come from?"

"How can you tell when a drummer's at the door? He doesn't know when to come in"

"What do you call slapping hands with (5^.5+1)/2? A high phive! I'll see myself out now."

"A magic tractor turns into a field... ...think about it..."