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Joke of the Day

"No one will get this.."

"How does an elephant get out of a small car ? The same way that he got in !"

"If you come to my front door with a clip board I will just ask you if your clip board is an ipad until you leave."

"Dad joke **Dad:** Whaddya got there son? **Son:** Soy milk. **Dad:** Hola milk, soy tu padre"

"My son is a real hand full. I didn't have any tissues handy."

"How do you measure the mass of God? Yahweh it of course."

"Australians don't have sex Australians mate."

"You know who'd make a good hobbit? Elijah would."

"My girlfriend used to smoke regularly. Then i slowed down and started using lube."

"I only eat beef raised on marijuana... I like it when the steaks are high."