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Joke of the Day

"why is being in the mafia and administering cunnilingus similar one slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit"

"This Status maybe recorded for quality and training purposes"

"What's the difference between Jimmy Fallon and myself? I can get through a Jimmy Fallon joke without laughing."

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Cliff ! Cliff who ? Cliff hanger !"

"She sent me a text saying she wearing something special for me... but every time I ask her what, she says ~ Nothing."

"Did you hear about the guy who froze himself? I hear he is 0K!"

"Congratulations! It's a boy Doctor : ""Congratulations! It's a boy!"" Parent : ""Sorry, did you just assume my child's gender?"""

"In a room full of idiots screaming their opinions at the top of their lungs, be the guy in the corner doing finger guns with his reflection."

"What's the difference between a Scotsman and the Rolling Stones? The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'"

"What did one lesbian vampire say to the other? ""See you next month!"""