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Joke of the Day

"I asked my wife what women really want and she said attentive lovers. ...Or maybe she said ""a tent of lovers."" I wasn't really listening..."

"My husband said he needs to have sex and now he is mad at me. Apparently, asking 'with each other' was the wrong response."

"My dementia keeps getting progressively fruit pants."

"Chris Brown dressed as Deadpool for Halloween and won a costume contest. The runner up was a girl dressed like Rihanna, but he beat her."

"How many protesters does it take to change a lightbulb? **TRICK QUESTION. THEY CAN'T CHANGE ANYTHING**"

"Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 50 seconds. Poor guy."

"So apparently airport security doesn't like it when you call shotgun before boarding a plane."

"What do you call a fat physic? A four-chin teller"

"Do you know about the group of hipster sheep? Never mind, you haven't herd of them."

"Why can't you cross the Mexican border in groups of three? There's no tres-passing!"