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Joke of the Day

"Made a hiking playlist called 'trail mix' It has a lot of eminem in it"

"I don't tell god how big my problems are, I tell my problems how big my god is."

"A canibal walks out of the restroom and looks to his friend... ...He then says, ""I shat the sheriff, but I did not shit the deputy"""

"Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student? Because education pays off in the long run!"

"I once went to a diner and ordered a chicken salad sandwich and an egg salad sandwich to see which would come first."

"My wife said she's leaving me due to my obsession with breakfast cereals. I replied cheerios then."

"When did Caesar reign ? I didn't know he reigned. Of course he did didn't they hail him ?"

"If I ever met an exact duplicate of myself I wouldn't hang out with him. I'm too cool for that fucking nerd"

"I thought I had a brain tumor but then I realized it was all in my head."

"I don't believe Trump when he says he doesn't smoke In the past 2 months I've seen him smoke 2 Cubans."