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Joke of the Day

"What do Eskimos get from sitting on the snow for too long? Polaroids."

"I bought a pair of shoes off my drug dealer... And they must have been laced with something, cause I've been tripping all day."

"After Luke Skywalker found out Princess Leia was his sister... He became best friends with hand solo."

"Why r/Jokes has too much tiny jokes? Thus you can move on to the next one faster"

"I have a confession to make... ""I want to get back with my ex""...LOL Just Kidding...""I'd rather sh!t in my hands and clap !"".."

"On Twitter, people respect you for sharing your deepest, darkest flaws. Unless those flaws are typos, in which case, die in a fire."

"My girlfriend makes me want to be a better man So I can get a better girlfriend"

"Interviewer: ""What's your greatest strength?"" *45 minutes later* Me: ""I'm very comfortable with silence."""

"What is the tallest building in the entire world Q: What is the tallest building in the entire world? A: The library, because it has so many stories."

"My doc said that I should stop smoking and drinking immediately. What does he care what I'm doing in the waiting room?"