152090

Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend makes me want to be a better man So I can get a better girlfriend"

"Jokes to Cheer someone up Okay, my best friend is feeling down, and I want to help cheer her up. Give me your best jokes for the occasion!"

"Trying out that new pickup line on a girl for the first time; whether it works or not, you'll wind up feeling a twat. *EYYYYYY*"

"Have you ever been on the Nile River? I heard it does on for miles and niles and niles... If you don't believe me, you may be in denial."

"Don't scream. I came to your house because you never responded to my DMs. Are you OK?"

"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. [Currently my 7 year old daughter's favorite joke]"

"I just passed my drug test my dealer has some explaining to do"

"I said hi to a feminist yesterday My court date is tomorrow"

"Mario: hey u up? Princess: yeah y? M: come over ;) P: can't. Kidnapped :( M: Where? I'll save u P: castle. Up stairs, next 2 flagpole M: k"

"Shattner didn't go to Nimoy's funeral, and Obama's been on the phone all weekend with the Vulcan ambassador, trying to smooth things over."