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Joke of the Day

"Things I hate: lists, Oxford commas, and irony."

"Can you tell me a dirty joke? I want to be more outgoing."

"How in the world did Bill & Hillary Clinton avoid the celebrity nickname HillBilly? WE DROPPED THE BALL AMERICA."

"A grasshopper walks into a bar The bartender says to the grasshopper ""You know, we have a drink named after you."" To which the grasshopper responds ""You have a drink named Pete?"""

"GOD- ""I will send a plague that will kill all living things on earth"" *Fish slip the LORD a $20* ""On second thought how about a flood?"""

"Why did the bicycle fall down? because it was two-tired."

"My wife keeps complaining about her nine to five job I must admit, 4:51 is a strange time to start work"

"I had a joke about the Baltimore Riots But someones already stolen it :("

"Why did the man lost in the woods catch fire? He was heading west."

"Jehovah's Witness: Do you have time to talk about Jesus? Jesus: *In disguise* sure JW: He's lame J: *rips off fake beard* Big mistake pal"