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Joke of the Day

"How did Hitler tie his shoes? In little nazis. Oldie but still good."

"Love is telling someone to go to hell and worrying about them getting there safely."

"I know its slightly distasteful but, what's the best way to punish a blind kid? rearrange the furniture"

"What language does a boxer who punches jokes speak? Punjabi-ng."

"Asked a hen how many eggs it lays daily? It said: two eggs I said: Oh strange! It said: what's strange? the fact that I lay two eggs? I said: no, the fact that you talk"

"Why was the Pedophile's movie rated PG-13? It only had minor nudity."

"Judge: Show us on this doll where the man hurt you. Me: He didn't. But watch this. [I make the doll do a backflip] Judge: Holy shit lol"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Cyclops Barbie ...one eye right in the middle of her forehead; Cyclops Ken sold separately"

"Why didn't the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren't loose."

"An Englishmen, a Scotsman and a Irishman went to a bar. They all had to leave because the Englishman wanted to go."