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Joke of the Day

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Cyclops Barbie ...one eye right in the middle of her forehead; Cyclops Ken sold separately"

"I broke my can opener.... .... I guess it was a can't opener. Source: happened when I tried to open a can of soup this morning."

"A rainy Friday is still better than a sunny Monday..."

"[my weiner falls off my body, into the toilet] ugh mercury must be in retrograde again"

"What's the best gift you can buy at Christmas? A broken drum, you can't beat it."

"Why do fencers make terrible Redditors? They always riposte."

"Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent and appearance suggests that you hail from the southeast."

"What does a Disneyland ride and Viagra have in common? You have to wait one hour for a 3 minute ride."

"What spice is the most welcoming? Cumin"

"What's the difference between men and women when it comes to drinking? My boys drive me to drink, but women drive me to drink."