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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock Who's there? Alask. Alask who? Alaska later"

"How do you measure how funny an electrical engineer is? You use an o-silly-scope!"

"I accidentally stabbed myself with a pen It drew blood."

"10 just informed me that exercising releases inner-dolphins. If that's not a reason to exercise, then I don't know what is."

"What do you call a worthless priest? holy shit."

"2 out of 3 isn't bad. Unless you come home from the park with 2 out 3 kids. Then it's bad"

"How can you tell how hard a nigga is? By the number of niggabytes in his hard drive."

"A man goes to the library... and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says, ""Fuck off, you won't bring it back."""

"In my experience, cross-eyed employees are the best deterrent against shoplifting. You just can't be positive that they're not watching."

"Shoutout to people who don't know what the opposite of in is. I'll give you some time for this one."