219202

Joke of the Day

"I was very disappointed to have to pay for my new roof. The builder had promised me it would be on the house."

"how do you know a basketball player has prostate cancer? he dribbles a lot"

"7: Dad what does this word mean Me: Bring me a dictionary *Smack up side the head Me: Now go google that shit"

"That was Samuel Jackson's first ever public appearance without saying ""mother$ucker"""

"What's worse than biting an apple and finding a worm? biting an apple and finding half a worm"

"Why was the cat afraid of the tree? Because of its bark."

"what do you give to the god of shit? Sacrifeces"

"How do you get holy water You boil the hell out of it"

"How many quarters does it take to play the Lord of the rings pinball game? None, it only takes Tolkiens"

"A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they spot a young boy on the other side. The priest says, ""Hey! Let's go fuck him!"" The rabbi thinks for a second and asks, ""Out of what?"""