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Joke of the Day

"2 Redditors walk into a bar... Which is funny because you'd think the 2nd guy would have seen the 1st one do it!"

"""We should definitely let dolphins go into space instead of monkeys"" said one scientist obviously not a dolphin dressed up as a scientist"

"Don't ever debate with an absurdist... because you will always chair apple man with hands for eyes."

"I'm a British real estate agent I only drink propertea."

"I masturbated so good last night, when I woke up, my dick was making breakfast."

"If you take the word ""spatula"" out of the dictionary it's just a list of things that aren't spatulas."

"I tried to donate blood to the Red Cross the other day... ...but they wouldn't accept it in a 5 gallon bucket. They also said it had to be mine."

"When an ad says critics are ""raving"" over a movie, I picture them all in a dark warehouse twirling glowsticks & giving each other back rubs."

"We should have known Communism would fail. There were a lot of red flags."

"There are 10 kinds of people Those who know binary and those who don't"