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Joke of the Day

"Yo girl, are you a zero APR loan? Because I don't really understand your terms and you keep saying you have no interest."

"Those who have some means think that the most important thing in the world is love; the poor know that it is money."

"I almost got raped in jail ... My family takes monopoly way too seriously."

"A baby is a horrible paper weight because it just keeps rolling off the desk."

"I'm gonna hang a Batman costume in my closet just to screw with myself when I get Alzheimer's."

"what does cellphone reception and princess diana have in common? They both die in tunnels"

"Saw a sticker that said ""my son was an honor student"". I almost got sad, but then I thought maybe he's not dead, maybe he's just stupid now"

"[NSFW] What came first: The egg or the chicken? The chicken, I don't think egg cums."

"I'm allergic to Everclear. It makes me break out.. Into handcuffs."

"A kid and his dad are playing cards... The kids tells his father ""Dad, I'm bored"" The father then pulls out a box and says ""are you sure you're not card board?"""