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Joke of the Day
"A reality show for little engines called ""So, You Think You Can?"""
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"Once, in 2006, I stayed off the internet for an entire 19 minutes."
"What do you call 32 white people locked in a closet? A captive Cherokee."
"""Here's the problem... You've got a Pokemon up there"" - me, as a proctologist"
"A businessman becomes a president Seriously this is a fucking joke"
"The Jewish Year is 5776. As of yesterday, the Chinese year is 4714... That means Jews had to exist for 1,062 years without Chinese Food. They call this time, ""The Dark Age."""
"""So, do you play any instruments?"" Me: *slaps knees for 30 minutes straight without breaking eye contact*"
"I've mathematically figured out how many upvotes it takes to get to the front page. Answer inside. [score hidden]"
"Standing in disbelief at an automated door that isn't opening for me is the closest I'll ever feel to having been born rich."
"Getting grey hair hurts less when you say you're sprouting tinsel instead."