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Joke of the Day
"My dick is like news... ...because it passes from mouth to mouth."
Next Joke
"Q. What's the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist? A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you."
"What is a chemist's favourite restaurant? Rubidium's."
"You better get out of here before the S.W.A.T. team arrives I just blew up a toilet. Say, did you hear the one about the man with chronic constipation? No? Well, no shit"
"[commercial] Narrator: These are real people and not actors- Actor watching the commercial: *throws lamp at TV* WE'RE PEOPLE TOO!"
"*Learns sign language to keep arguing with boyfriend while giving the silent treatment*"
"What's the second to last thing the redneck said before he died? Shit, I can do that.. What about the last thing? Look, I'm doing it!!!"
"How do you give a quadriplegic a headache? Ask him to hold open the elevator door"
"The hardest part What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheel chair"
"So the bus driver said to the string ""Are you a string?"" and the string said ""No I'm afraid not"". (A frayed knot)."