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Joke of the Day

"How many Persona fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. 1 to screw it in, and 1 to complain that it's not dark enough."

"What's the difference between a baby shower and a bukkake? Nothing."

"TIL Supreme Court judge kidnapped by cannibals in the Caribbean! Justice was served."

"Niagara Falls Viagra lifts!"

"I am pro animal rights, but I don't get why PETA campaigns against cosmetic testing on animals. Don't animals have the right to feel sexy, too?"

"It seems like every year I wind up eating leftovers from Thanksgiving until weeks afterwards. Not this year though, I'm quitting cold turkey."

"Today I locked myself out of my car after dropping off my girlfriend at the local Planned Parenthood The worst part was having to go in and ask for a coat hanger"

"[being murdered] Me: did you get that knife out of the dishwasher Murderer: ...yes Me: and you didnt empty it Murderer: [murder roles reverse]"

"Brokeback Mountain pretty much ruined camping as a male bonding activity for straight guys."

"What happens when you get hit by a rental car? It Hertz."