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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a women with two brain cells? Pregnant with twins"

"Me: There is a small tree on fire. 911: Could you describe it? Me:Picture shrubbery...now picture it engulfed in flames."

"My Indian friend decided to take off his turban Hats off to him."

"Me: Hey. Nice Honda. Him: It's an Acura. Me: All Asian cars look alike. Him: You're racist. Me: I bet your Toyota is good at math."

"So I have a black girlfriend now ...after I severely burned my hand on the stove"

"How do you catch a WiFi? With an ethernet!"

"It's Christmas Eve, not Christmas and Steve. Get out of here Steve."

"I don't hate my job. I just really enjoy curling up in a ball and sobbing under a blanket in the backseat of my car during lunch."

"Why did God make man before woman? You need a rough draft before you have a final copy."

"Since it's hunting season, we are allowed to shoot the cars with the antlers on them, right?"