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Joke of the Day

"Linguistic studies have shown results about drivers of east asian cars... It is proven that a large number of Hyundai owners have an accent."

"Q: Why does everyone hate a banjo right off? A: Saves time."

"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu!"

"I want a house I can drive my car in You could drive from vroom to vroom."

"A survey says parents spend $1k on their children's electronics yearly. When WE were young we walked 5 miles uphill in the snow w/ NO APPS!"

"Order of the Phoenix is my favourite Harry Potter book Dead serious."

"Great wine is like great jazz... It confuses me and I'm pretty sure it's all the same. EDIT: Front page? Hot damn! Now what do I do with my life?"

"My sister while kneading dough: ""This hand workout dough!"""

"How do you stop an angry rhino from charging? You take away its credit card"

"I only wear dresses on sad occasions, like funerals and weddings."