216768

Joke of the Day

"Ever wonder why you always get a boner when you look in the mirror? That's because your dick thinks you're a cunt too!"

"Did you hear the one about the guy with five dicks? His pants fit like a glove!!"

"I just bumped into my old headmistress who said how weird it is to see me all grown up now. Surely it would be weirder if I was still 9."

"Why are knives always the funniest students at utensil school? Because they're the class cut-ups."

"What they're actually saying is ""I can't even [finish this sentence due to the complexities of being a white girl on the existential level]"""

"Whats black, white, red and rolls around in a KFC parking lot? Litter that the wind blew out of the trash you racist piece of shit!"

"Look, if all you have is candy corn in this van, I'm going to have to get out."

"A deer stumbles out of the forest and says ""that's the last time I do that for two bucks."""

"So a three legged dog walks into a bar and says, ""I'm lookin for the man that shot my paw."""

"So a guy wants to live on a Danish island... He finds that the island is empty."