141587

Joke of the Day

"What they're actually saying is ""I can't even [finish this sentence due to the complexities of being a white girl on the existential level]"""

"What is ISIS? They are Radical!!! Please don't hurt me...."

"[camera cuts to me in crowd at NFL game holding a giant sign that says ""I CAN'T BELIEVE THE HOT DOGS ARE 8 DOLLARS""]"

"Two men walk into a bar The third ducks. LOL"

"I've got a conspiracy joke that no one would believe, even though the punchline is in plain sight."

"What is a capitalist's favorite fetish? Vore, because it's all about consumption"

"If you're doing nothing wrong, you have nothing to hide from the giant surveillance apparatus the government's been hiding."

"How do you blindfold an Asian woman? Put a windshield in front of her."

"I just rinsed with mouthwash to cover up the m&ms on my breath. Being an adult is stupid."

"How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce ""Unionize""."