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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the one about the guy with five dicks? His pants fit like a glove!!"

"I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl on one hand. It's seven."

"[x-ray] DOCTOR: wow ME: what DOCTOR: I don't know, there's a bunch of- ME: *eating a handful of pennies* a bunch of what"

"Who are the fastest readers of all time? 9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 15 seconds"

"What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? A: Snowballs."

"What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wipe."

"What do a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common? They can both smell it but they can't eat it."

"I might drive you crazy, but at least I'll take the scenic route."

"How come Justin Bieber doesn't like to shop at Sports Authority? Because he likes Dick's."

"Religion is a multi-billion dollar industry and those benefiting financially from it will do everything in their power to keep the con going."