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Joke of the Day

"I just bumped into my old headmistress who said how weird it is to see me all grown up now. Surely it would be weirder if I was still 9."

"A condom and a coffin. Both are designed for stiffs. The difference is one is for coming and the other for going"

"What's the worst thing about having sex with 22 year olds??? There's 20 of them."

"What's worse than fighting an uphill battle? Getting to the top and realizing it's all downhill from there."

"What do you call an original joke on this subreddit? Rare."

"What is the worst icebreaker? The Titanic"

"Q. What do you call a line dancer on a cruise? A. An Ocean ""Liner"""

"We met for coffee yada yada yada next thing I know we're in the back of my car covered in lobsters and her dog is driving us to the ER"

"When someone texts you ""hahahahaha!!"" instead of ""haha"" or ""lol"", you know you've done well."

"My greatest fear is having a star athlete injure himself and having the coach look into the crowd and point at me to take his place"