216222

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the Polak who won a Gold medal in the Olympics? He was so proud he took it home and had it bronzed."

"What's Santa's favourite metal band? Sleigher."

"She says talking to me is like talking to a kid. Therapist: And how many years has this been going on? *holds up 6 fingers* This many"

"Basically, I'm paying for a gym membership just to have the keyring thingy so people think I actually go to one..."

"I've had a really bad day. First, my wife got ran over by a bus. Then, I lost my job as a bus driver."

"Killed a spider for my wife last night and got laid. Now every.spider.must.die."

"Before having a kid the most important thing to ask yourself is ""Am I ready to watch the exact same cartoon on repeat for the next 4 years?"""

"I hear they designed the newest iPhone to fit perfectly in your hand, right where your money used to be."

"Statistics say there's a gay guy in every group of friends. I think it's Tim.. he's got a great ass."

"""Paypal me your lunch money!"" -Cyber Bullies"