216027

Joke of the Day

"An atom is mugged by another atom... A bystander asks if he's OK. ""I think he got away with my favorite electron,"" he answered. ""Oh no! Are you sure?"" ""Yup, I'm positive."""

"""Why buy expensive fireworks when you can make your own with ordinary household chemicals?"" I said, and the other patients in the ER agreed."

"Only 4 percent of Texas residents think there is an immigration problem... The other 96% said ""que dijo?"""

"If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims."

"Why did the little boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a car"

"Why is Peter Pan such a terrible pilot? Because he Neverlands"

"How many Germans does it take to screw in a Lightbulb? **One.** **Germans are very efficient and not very funny.** *Source: My co-worker.* *I'm German and I approve this message.*"

"Can't believe i actually met a guy named Dick Putinson"

"I used to steal jokes I still do, but I used to too"

"How do you get 50 Canadians out of the swimming pool? Say, "" Everyone out of the pool please."""