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Joke of the Day

"How does a frog fasten two objects together? Rivets."

"Worst trigonometry joke I know. Actually, I won't bother telling it, it's too obtuse."

"How can you tell a mechanic got laid? He has one clean finger"

"What do vegetarian zombies eat? Graaaiiinnss."

"What's a bees favourite novel ? The Great Gats-bee !"

"For Easter, I will hide pieces of IKEA furniture all over the house and then have my kid assemble it. If she succeeds, she gets chocolate."

"The best thing about being an accountant is that everyone assumes you're not a psychopath."

"Looking for new roommates on Craigslist... ...is it too anal to ask whether or not they're into it?"

"Why are there no cats in Germany? Because they have nein lives."

"What's the best way to piss off your best friend? Stand on top of his head and make it rain."