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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an Asian driveby? Cap-a-chino"

"Why doesn't r/jokes like fencers? Because they always riposte."

"why cant women count to 70 because 69 is a mouth full"

"There are ten types of people in this world Those who understand binary and.. wait, shit"

"Fridges should have glass doors.That way i dont have to stand with the fridge door open trying to figure out my next move."

"How many Elvis impersonators does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One for the money, two for the show."

"So a finch asks his mother... ""Mom, why does my beak look different than yours?"" She replies, ""Well son, I hate to break it to you, but you're adapted."""

"Whats small,green and smells like pork ? Kermit the frogs dick !"

"[Drug deal] How do I know you're not a cop -If I was a cop would I do this? *Starts breakdancing* Thats not as much proof as you think it is"

"My mother in law bought a talking parrot, but returned it a week later. ""This parrot hasn't spoke a single word."" She complained. ""I haven't had a fucking chance to!"" Replied the parrot."