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Joke of the Day
"""I really have no idea how to pronounce my name but I won't admit it."" Guys named Geoff."
Next Joke
"I hate little dogs. I can only love dogs that could kill me."
"Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday 13th.The next day he won the lottery"
"How do two lawyers greet each other? With a firm handshake."
"What do you do if the Ocean stares at you? Sea it and Wave :3"
"[Installing ceiling fan] Me: drill...screwdriver... tape...there finished! Wife on the phone: Is this Bob's fix-it shop? Yeah, he just got done."
"Getting a PhD is like an erection, it's long and hard.... unless you're Chinese."
"There are now five cup sizes at Starbucks: Short, Tall, Grande, Venti, and Chuck Norris."
"My dad died five years ago but I still see him everywhere I look. Makes me wish I hadn't dismembered him."
"Three friends were casually talking. -I bumped into my Russian friend yesterday -Vladislav? -Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more!"