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Joke of the Day

"German scientists have discovered a new drug, derived from the bacteria *Adolfus hitlerii*, which will be applied to people with ADD. Its ad campaign will carry the slogan ""It helps Jew concentrate"""

"in a kindergarten class, there is a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. which one do you date? the blonde. she's 18."

"What do you get when you mix clickbait and major disappointment?"

"My mom pops out from under the table while I'm on a date. She's always been a good eater. You see her hips? Good hips. Stand up, show him-"

"Sexist joke (insulting but funny) What do you call a woman who's lost 95% of her intelligence? Divorced!"

"(Age 22) *chugs bottle of water* Let's shoot some more hoops! (Age 42) *chugs bottle of water* I gotta pee."

"What did the drug dealer say when he saw the clock. Its 4:20 dude!!! 420 blaze it"

"I guess even though he's resigning, the pope is still against birth control- That's why he pulled out."

"My boss said to me, ""you're the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?"" I said, ""I'm not sure; it's hard to keep track."""

"Seeing as how reddit is taking so many pictures of lightning... Reddit must have some lightning fast reflexes"