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Joke of the Day

"Nerdy Fairy Tale ""Grandmother, what big ears you have!"" ""Since I can't see you, I can at least hear you Infrared Ridinghood..."""

"Dinner When my wife asks me ""What do you want to have for dinner"" I never guess right."

"Why don't drug addicts hang out at the beach? They don't like getting sand in their crack."

"Whenever my husband opens his wardrobe he shouts and curses. I think he's a cross dresser."

"When I was younger MTV actually played videos. That's what the M stands for. Music. Not Maternity, Motherhood or Moron."

"Life is not like a box of chocolates. It's more like not being allowed to leave the table until you finish your brussels sprouts."

"Lady GaGa is easily the scariest of all the Muppets."

"There are 10 kinds of people... Those who understand binary code, And those who don't."

"Hmmm... Should I be a TA or a ""Lady of the night""? ""If you wanted people to fuck you for money you could just continue being a TA. I get told I'm fucking people's lives all the time."""

"The revolution will not be televised. It will be streaming on netflix this summer"