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Joke of the Day
"TIL 78% of statistics are made up on the spot"
Next Joke
"What did the girl's suicide note say when she hung herself? *sings* I WANNA SWIIIING FROM THE CHANDELIERRRRRR"
"A man's wife and his lawyer are drowning, and he must make a choice; so, he chooses to go to the movies. The end. just heard this on *Mad Men* btw"
"Michael J. Fox is extremely formal... ...he even shakes hands with his wife."
"I still eat around bruised parts of fruit like a scared 4-year-old."
"[slams on the brakes] WHAT DO YOU MEAN LINDSAY LOHAN PLAYED BOTH TWINS IN THE PARENT TRAP"
"Being the first to move in chess. It's a white privilege."
"A BLONDE'S BRAIN Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? A: Pregnant."
"I had coffee with Red Bull this morning... After about 10 minutes on the highway, I realized I left my car at home."
"Why is Pokemon quite realistic? Because in the games, Bug-types are effective against Dark-types. Just like malaria in Africa."