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Joke of the Day

"Cop: show us where the hamburgers are, hamburglar Hamburglar: you've got the wrong guy. I steal ham. You're thinking of hamburgerburglar"

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"What do scientists and vegetables have in common? Stephen Hawking"
"What did the white guy say when he found out his sister got knocked up by her black boyfriend? ""Well I'll be a monkey's uncle!"""
"I imagine by now all you Evian drinkers have read the name backwards?"
"What is it called when Donald Trump rides a camel? A trump on a hump"
"me: it smells like updog in here me: what's updog me: not much dog what's up with you lmao me: lol therapist: I see"
"How many electrons does a negatively charged oxygen atom have? Nion"
"How amphetamine addiction is called? Need for Speed."
"Did you hear Gotye converted from Judaism to Catholicism? After realizing he didn't need to follow Jewish customs, he exclaimed to the rabbi, ""you didn't have to cut me off!"""
"Autocorrect? More like Autocorrect! Am I right? Sorry, Autocorrect ruined my joke."