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Joke of the Day
"Top 3 situations that require witnesses: 1) Crimes 2) Accidents 3) Marriages Need I say more?"
Next Joke
"*Uses public restroom **Squats so long walks out with buns of steel"
"Man, all the girls I saw today were so hot ...because it was 90 degrees out."
"Why is Quicksilver so fast? Because he's Russian"
"I go in hard, I come in soft, you blow me. What am I? Gum."
"What do you do when you see a space man? Park the car, man."
"Do you like him like him, or just Facebook like him?"
"Happy penis to Sigmund Freud. What? No, I'm pretty sure I said ""birthday."""
"I just invented a new catch phrase What's yer Rush Limbaugh? Get back to me immediately and tell me if you love it or just like it."
"Have you heard of that movie Gravity? I heard it was... full of suspense"