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Joke of the Day

"I didn't sleep a wink last night because my neighbor was screaming her head off. I think she doesn't like my basement."

"I wonder why nobody told Forrest Gump's mom that all you have to do is flip over the box of chocolates and it tells you what's inside."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I've never let a garbanzo bean in my mouth."

"Marriage must be difficult for gay people Ive heard it can be a real pain in the ass."

"""No, no, I said I'm a PEDALPHILE. I'm super into bicycling. So that's a no go on the job now, huh?"""

"What did the Ents yell as they attacked Isengard? Ambush."

"Hey men, don't be fooled by maxipad commercials. Ladies aren't really full of blue windshield washer fluid."

"Any leftover cabbage can and will be shredded and mixed with mayo - Cole's Law"

"What do you call a friendly Chinese man who gives out free firewood? Kind Ling"

"Did you hear about the murdered essay? They can't find the body."