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Joke of the Day

"Going to work My boss told me yesterday, ""Don't dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want"". But when I turned up at the office today in Ghostbusters gear, the bastard said I was fired."

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"- What do you do to relax? - I enjoy people watching. - The most relaxing thing for me is singing in the shower. - I know."
"Why do Jews watch porn backwards? Because they like to climax at the part when the hooker gives the money back."
"Watching football (soccer), I see that it is very relevant to my life Little to no goals"
"Why do sharks hate clowns? They taste funny"
"When do you care for a man's company? ""When he owns it."""
"""Beatles or Stones?"" I asked my son. ""Why can't I just have something normal for dinner?"" he pleaded"
"2 men walked into a bar And their head hit first."
"What's long and hard on a black guy His prison sentence I hope this hasn't been said before, I half came up with this all by my lonesome"
"Saw an ad for a used battery in the paper today: ""Slightly rusty, in need of repair but has potential"""