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Joke of the Day

"The other day, an ex girlfriend of mine was hit by a bus near my house And I thought to myself ""that could've been me"" Then I remembered - I can't drive a bus"

Next Joke
 
"Unshakable Fact # 1 A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing them."
"Women call it a secret sixth sense, men call it paranoia."
"I had to change the battery in my clock. It was about time."
"Are rape jokes funny in this subreddit? I wouldn't want to do anything if you guys said NO."
"Why did the rich guy crash his car? He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends"
"Why did the semen cross the road? The chicken came first"
"What do you get when you mix Viagra with Disney World? Kicked out."
"Yea...sure! I was hoping someone would come and stand uncomfortably close to me today"
"Me with megaphone: ""COME DOWN FROM THERE. YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR."" Man: ""I'm fixing your roof tiles, remember?"" Me: ""I FORGOT!"""