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Joke of the Day

"Wired: ""Machine learning will TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"" Amazon: ""We see you bought a wallet. Would you like to buy ANOTHER WALLET?"""

"What do you say to a guy with kidney stones? Urine trouble."

"I saw that Caitlin Jenner was missing... On the side of a half-and-half carton"

"What do they call Bro Chads in the U.K.? ......Bloke chaps. Play me off Johnny!"

"When I die I want my skeleton turned into a xylophone. Just like the good ol' days."

"There's something really addictive about Brownies... ... I think it's their exotic accent."

"What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce in the South? Nothing, someone's losing the trailer. -Robin Williams"

"When a group of mercenary electric powered robot horsemen attack... ...is it a charge charge charge?"

"What happens when you cross an American and a polar bear. Same as before, lazy and fat."

"Trying to decide who to leave my middle fingers to when I die."