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Joke of the Day

"I saw that Caitlin Jenner was missing... On the side of a half-and-half carton"

"Honey you're like my GPS... I'd be lost without you."

"My credit has gotten so bad... ...that Mastercard started sending me bills in Spanish."

"Had trouble sleeping today. They added a trumpeter to this morning's church service."

"In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized."

"(-i)^2=-1. Moral: If you fiddle with imaginary problems too much, shit's gonna get real."

"6, holding a pic of me pregnant with him, ""Why are you SO FAT?"" Me, ""You're inside my tummy."" 6, ""That's DISGUSTING."" Me, ""It gets worse.."""

"Online piracy is bad, one time I downloaded a boat"

"This joke is brought to you by Arnold Schwarzeneggers one-sided chess set. ""I'll be black"""

"Boy: Dad Dad come out. My sister's fighting this ten foot gargoyle with three heads. Dad: No I'm not coming out. She's going to have to learn to look after herself."