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Joke of the Day

"I found Jesus the other day....... and if no one claims him within 30 days, by gosh, I am going to keep him!"

"Ever heard of the DNA? National Dyslexic Association."

"Do you know what they say about the guy that invented life savers? He sure made a mint."

"How many potatoes does it take to kill an irishman? None"

"Being a parent is the opposite of the Jenny Craig diet. ""I gained 20lbs & all I did was eat small portions of my toddlers leftover dinner."""

"A prisoner was told how he'll be executed Needless to say, he was shocked."

"Christmas song Single bells, Single bells. Single all the way. My crush said let's be friends. Friendzone all the way !!"

"Why did the cat sleep under the car ? Because she wanted to wake up oily !"

"My cat freaked out when I told him he was adopted. Granted, I spelled it out on the floor with a laser pointer."

"What do call a prehistoric hooker? Vaginasaurass"