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Joke of the Day

"One time i asked a guy what he was majoring in and he said women's studies... I then said, why are you in women's studies? You study women all the time!"

"Please stop praying for my grandpa u are making him too strong. He broke out of the hospital & cops say their tasers don't work on him :("

"I almost got ran over by joggers. I saved myself by pretending to be a stop light. I got away while they jogged in place."

"My Pet Mouse Elvis Died Today He got caught in a trap."

"Her: Your c**k is small Me: An RV is big until you park it in the Grand Canyon."

"Friend: I love FB but it's gettin a lil boring. Me: Well that's cause all the cool peeps are on Twi- ..uh are all dead. Yeah they all died."

"What kind of overalls does Mario wear? denim denim denim"

"""For people that are hungry but would also like something to drink."" Pitch for Soup"

"I was armed to the teeth. Now most of my teeth are gone. Let's just say I filed an assault case."

"I just saw a man pick up a screaming child and take her to his van. Man, kids are getting carried away these days."