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Joke of the Day
"I told my therapist what you said and she's gonna call your therapist and you're in big trouble"
Next Joke
"My friend is a sex offender. He never abused anybody, people are just offended at the thought of having sex with him."
"Where's the best place to have a waffle on the beach? San Diego. (Sandy Eggo)"
"Q: What did the book say to the librarian? A: Can I take you out?"
"Son:Dad's trick or treating as a ghost in a bed sheet? Wife:& heels,eye patch & his hand stuck in a Nutella jar. More like a ghost on ambien"
"Making the arrangements for my wife's funeral is tough. She keeps asking what I'm doing"
"Your mom's like a gong, everybody bangs her."
"What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I've never paid $200 to have a lentil on my face."
"Nice Girls are found in every corner of the world... ...unfortunately, the world is round."
"Sometimes all I'm really doing with my life is just trying to make it from one weekend to the next."