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Joke of the Day
"I don't do cocaine I just like to smell it"
Next Joke
"Babies are just like turtles, keep them in water and also feed them turtle food."
"Want to know the secret to killing two birds with one stone? Throw it twice."
"What is the best thing about having sex with twenty nine years olds? There are twenty of them."
"im 100% for equal rights for women! I mean so what they are inferior to men?"
"*plays Rocky theme song* *cracks 5 raw eggs into glass and gulps them down* *vomits on kitchen floor* *turns off music* *cleans kitchen*"
"How many hobos does it take to screw in a light bulb? They don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in dumpsters"
"Me: Wake up son! Son: Just 30 more minutes please Me: I'm borrowing your phone Son jumps of the bed: I'm awake!"
"""Nwbdy tellsh mwe wht to dwo"", I say through a mouthful of cardboard, giving a middle finger to ""remove pizza from box before consumption""."
"""You know what would make this rice even better? Racism."" - Pitch meeting for Uncle Ben's"