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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a punctuation mark that's got a girlfriend? ..accommodating."

"Did you hear Mr. Fanatic started delivering gifts to children? They call him the elastic clause."

"What do you call a student that graduates bottom of their class in Med school? A doctor."

"English people smh... 75% of English people do not know the opposites to these words. Always Coming From Take Me Down"

"I recently switched from Wells Fargo to a credit union... ...my banking got much simpler - bye all accounts."

"I hated Sex Ed at school. Or 'Sexy Edward', to give him his full name."

"Q: What do Roseanne Barr and a battleship have in common? ... A: They both need three tugs to get into their slips."

"Dudes that only Retweet chicks: Your mom just called. Down to the basement. Come upstairs. Your dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets are ready."

"My neighbor, an elderly prostitute, adopted a puppy and asked me if I could help train it. I told her ""No sorry, you can't teach an old trick's new dog."""

"What did the toaster say to the pop tart? I want you inside of me."