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Joke of the Day

"Got a couple of real nice piles of dog shit on your lawn there. Sure would be a shame if something was to... you know, ""happen"" to them."

"My girlfriend is a pornstar... She's going to be pissed when she finds out."

"What is Batman's favorite sport? Baseball."

"that moment when football players come out of the locker room and realize they're all wearing the same thing again"

"Old people at weddings always poke me and say your next So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals"

"Q: How does a blind skydiver know the ground is near? A: The leash goes slack."

"Read at own Risk "

"What's it called when you a kill a sapling? Arbortion"

"My girlfriend said she's break up with me if I didn't stop being a casanova. Apparently she doesn't like that I live in my Chevy."

"My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs."