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Joke of the Day

"i was one of the palm trees waving around in the background of every 16 bit game in the 90's so yes random guy you do know me from somewhere"

"How many Christians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But only for procreation."

"A Jew, a woman, and a racist walk into a bar. The bartender says ""I bet you thought this was going to be about the elections, didn't you?"""

"What did the sadist say when the masochist said ""Hit me""? ""No."""

"""Just so you know, you're coming home with me tonight."" I whisper to all the leftover food on the table from our dinner date."

"Rabbi So today I was wondering, when a rabbi performs a circumsision, does he get paid or does he just keep the tips?"

"Cruz picked Fiorina as his running mate. She probably gives better head than Kasich."

"What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Dad."

"A jewish man with a boner runs into a wall He broke his nose"

"What's the difference between a hipster and a lumberjack? The lumberjack has a job."