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Joke of the Day
"My son played soccer in the mud all day. He was a little Messi."
Next Joke
"Why did the vegetables invite the mushroom to their party? They heard he was a fungi"
"Me and my recliner... We go way back."
"What's E.T. short for? Cus he's got little legs"
"*sneeze once* God bless you! *sneeze twice* God bless you. *sneeze three times* Get your shit together, Steve."
"Roses are red Violets are blue Who shit in my garden?"
"if you tell your guests your house was just broken into and fake cry they will clean it for free"
"What's worse than having ants in your pants? Uncles"
"""Beatles or Stones?"" I asked my son. ""Why can't I just have something normal for dinner?"" he pleaded"
"(really fucked up joke) How do you say happiness in German? Auschwitz"