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Joke of the Day

"Bruce Willis in Starbucks. he gives his name as ""not Bruce Willis"" and when they call him he grabs his coffee and runs away giggling"

"What do you call a white man flying a plane? Clive, usually."

"What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk... budumdum tssssss"

"1 in 2 in 3 in 4 in 5 doctors are babushka dolls."

"What do you call a Polish chicken stuck in a tree? Poll tree!"

"If Jesus played soccer, what position would he play? Not on the wing, he doesn't do well with crosses."

"Abortion... ...it brings out the kid in you."

"When you say ""9 out of 10 forest fires are caused by humans"" all I hear is ""there's a bear out there who knows how to use matches."""

"Why did the vegetable thief get a lighter sentence? Because he admitted the crime was *parsley* his fault."

"""Oh man, you've got stretched lobes and piercings? I've got stretched lobes and piercings, too!"" ""Sweet! We should hang out!"" - Ear buds"