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Joke of the Day
"What is the cheapest type of meat? Deer balls. They're under a buck."
Next Joke
"Hate when you wake up & think it's the weekend but then realise death is inevitable eternal emptiness"
"Never using online dating again. Last guy said he lived in a gated community. Prison. He meant prison."
"I want to work in salon.. So I can get paid to give facials"
"WHISKERS: There's nothing there. Go ahead. BLIND PERSON: *Steps off cliff* WHISKERS: Technically ^-- why we don't have seeing-eye cats"
"David Cameron: Tax evasion is morally wrong, I leaned that from my father. The tax evasion bit, not the morally wrong bit."
"I'd rather watch a 3D video of my conception than watch one episode of The Real Housewives."
"When I make Breakfast all I want is a ""Thank You"", Not ""Who are you and how did you get into my house"""
"Your mama so fat that NASA thought they found a new planet Dad stop it."
"me: i dont want any kids person: *low chuckle* oh, you'll change your mind. me: *grabs them by collar* tell me more about the future, wizard"