209921

Joke of the Day

"What's the best iPhone app for telling a kid he's adopted?"

"The pigeons behind my apartment are fighting for claim to half a rain soaked hotdog. Fighting me."

"What's an sjw's favorite subject? Triggerednometry"

"Why does a chicken coup have two doors? If it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!"

"Children are like farts... ...You can only tolerate your owns"

"First joke I ever told. You know what a hypocrite is? A guy that hates cats, but loves pussy."

"Here's a promise - if a scuba shop is within sprinting distance of the ocean and they let me try stuff on I'm not paying for a damn thing."

"damn girl are you calculus because I have no idea what youre talking about"

"We the People ~~We the People~~ We the electoral college"

"Airplanes: offering you the comforts of gas station food/drinks at popular night club prices"